Reframing Apologies; Part II
Following my previous post on how we respond to apologies from others, I want to touch on how we so often say "I'm sorry" unnecessarily. So many of us (and I don't mean Canadians) tend to overapologize. We say we're sorry for our very selves, our emotions, how we're showing up or conditions that are a part of being human. I'm not saying we shouldn't take accountability, just that we should be more aware of the language we use to do so.
A shift that can hold accountability, while not dismissing our value or dismissing our human experiences, can be to use thank you instead. This adjustment in word choice has space for connection in the relationship and acknowledges the experience we are trying to address.
Let’s explore some alternatives:
"I'm sorry I didn't respond earlier" becomes "Thank you for your patience."
"I'm sorry for dumping all this on you" becomes "Thank you for listening to me."
"I'm sorry for being so emotional" becomes "Thank you for being there for me."
"I'm sorry, I'm such a mess today" becomes "Thank you for accepting me as I am."
It's important to be mindful of saying "I'm sorry" in situations that don't require an apology, especially when expressing our emotions or simply being human. Instead of defaulting to unnecessary apologies, we can shift our language to gratitude; saying "thank you" rather than "I'm sorry." This reframe can foster connection, honour our experiences, and still hold accountability.